For many of us who are high achievers, perfectionists, procrastinators, or really anyone who’s heard the familiar voice that sounds something along the lines of “why can’t you just get it together?” you’ve been well acquainted with your inner critic.

We all have an inner critic to some capacity. Contrary to how it may feel, our critic isn’t out to “get us” (although the result of it can leave us feeling down and unmotivated). and it doesn’t have an intention to make us feel stuck, although ironically this is what usually ends up happening.

Cognitive rigidity can show up when we’ve envisioned something or have expectations that don’t get met, and have a difficult time changing course or going with the flow. Our vision isn’t working out, and our brain is telling us something is very wrong. It may feel almost impossible to not fixate on how we’re disappointed or angry.

So many of us struggle with self-esteem, anxiety, depression, self-talk, and our overall sense of identity.

Now, I’m not here to say there’s a quick fix to any of these, but I am here to say you don’t have to continuously struggle with these issues for the rest of your life.

Many of my clients have talked to me about feeling “out of whack” with who they want to be and what they care about, but can’t seem to get “back on track.”

They tell me they cognitively know what could help them and what is most likely making things worse, but they just keep doing the stuff they know isn’t helping.

Sound familiar?

In psychology, we call this phenomenon “cognitive dissonance”. In other words, we say we value or believe something, but our behavior speaks otherwise.